Addressing the devil on the streets

There has to be a devil whispering in people's ears. ~KR

PS: This is a highly opinionated piece. If you'd like to criticize, do it constructively :) Thank you. Also note, anywhere you see 'men' or 'women' I mean 'some men' or 'some women.'

I have been stumbling over my words and thoughts for the past couple of hours.

Not to mention feeling like I had to ask for permission to write this piece.

It's always been that way when you want to talk about something that threatens the lives of thousands of women every day in Kenya.

And there you will find some bitter, backward men and women ready to pounce on you.

Bluntly put, I'd like to talk about the atrocities that women have been facing.

And yes, I'm also including the catcalling, the audacity that men have to brush their hands across a woman's body while trying to get a pass.

Like ewww, get a life, find Jesus, and PLEASE wash your damn hands!!

Now, I'm not here to regurgitate facts but to help you picture how disgusting this is.

How twisted it is!

I'm currently doing a term paper on a case study around conflict: arms sales and trafficking. The statistics seem unreal because I cannot a certain thought out of my head; these numbers are not mere numbers with a percentage sign.

These are real people.

Real women, real girls, and boys are taken to foreign lands to ensure someone's pockets stay full.

I cannot remove the thought of the kind of lives robbed from them with their eyes wide open. And it's not like they went looking for trouble, they just happened to be women and children in a vulnerable position.

All it took was a wicked, twisted, and greedy mind whose pockets itched for the next fix or zeros in their bank account.

Heck, street cred! The things men do sometimes appall me.

Not to mention the pedophiles, perverts, and the men who think it's okay to abuse men...

YES- but that's not a conversation for this post.

These people know where it hurts and they know it will leave a scar.

They know.

Something interesting a friend of mine keeps reminding me—

People know what they are doing.

So the men raping women and men KNOW what they are doing,

It has nothing to do with the wrong place or wrong time...

If I liken this similar mindset to how women and children are trafficked, then I would be damned!

I would be a fool to tell a woman that violence seems to love her trail as she was unlucky to be born a woman—

That the only sin a woman carries is being born a woman and using that to justify everything that happens to her. I would be damned!

To anyone with a lingering thought of 'they asked for it' or 'they dressed a certain way' or 'what they were doing at a certain place,'- you should be ashamed of yourself!

What baffles me is how someone can confidently mention that a woman asked for her death or sexual assault because of how they dressed or because of where they were.

I mean, someone's life was taken from them, some even decapitated and someone can confidently take their phone and type that?! So much for caring about the sacredness of human life... Or did these women not have enough dignity for you?

Did they not matter because they died in a gruesome manner at the hands of a man?!

Did her life not matter?

Don't you dare mention that it happened when she was looking for sexual pleasure because I know damn well that sex takes two parties to happen.

Or is it okay when men gallavant around for sex?

Riddle me that!

Maybe you'd raise hell if it was someone you knew?

Maybe that's when your humanity shines...

The time you'd switch your words and seek justice...

I mean, DANG- When did society stoop this low??!

Moreso, the women who dare to comment a certain way- so much for women standing up for women... It's beyond embarrassing.

It's almost laughable cause I don't think you can cry about it.

It's dumbfounding.

Whatever happened to valuing the dignity of a human person?

Of human life? When did society stop fighting for that?

What's more sickening is when women normalize this behavior.

When they talk to their daughters or their younger sisters, the first question always points to the girl and what possible contribution she could have made to cause a violation of her own body!

Like, get for real! Gurl!

I am so exhausted of this similar question bank:

• What were you wearing?

• How were you seated?

• What did you say?

• How did you greet him?

• Why did you wear that? Didn't you know where you were going?

Like um..... Maybe check if I am okay... If I am breathing properly. If I am in shock!

Also, why is this the first question directed to girls who've probably mustered up their courage to talk about this- to share their experience?

This is the very reason many girls seldom tell their parents about being molested or sexually assaulted.

For some reason, the girl is wrong, and the action upon her body is frowned upon not to mention the occasions this incident will ALWAYS be brought up at every point in her life.

A scenario I could play with; she doesn't get married. Ha! Ni ju alishikwa shikwa

(It's because she was touched- alluding to her not being pure.)

Ah, she got assaulted again? It's her fault. It seems she does not learn. Sasa ona...

What drives me crazy is that many girls have a story to tell about their experiences yet seem far removed from it. Dismiss it as something that was bound to happen.

That has to happen.

Listen, it is not normal for a man to assault your body.

Neither do you have to go through it!

It's not like it's a rite of passage to womanhood- keep that in mind, ladies!

Not to mention the snide comment from a woman who sees my jeans are too tight or whatever nonsense... MIND YOUR DAMN BUSINESS.

I didn't know you got the role to speak up for the hormones of men...

Their supposed well-being.

Heck, I did not know you are the only thing that is standing between me and a potential assault because men cannot control themselves until they plant a seed in a hole.

These are the many reasons which make the lines a bit blurred because I could be wearing modest clothing that is sweeping the floor and a man will still rape me if he wanted to.

As I said, people know EXACTLY what they are doing!

So throw that nonsense out the window...

Every time this happens, I get more convinced that women think men are animals or children who need to be protected and looked after.

Aki woiye you'll tempt him to want to slip his hand under your skirt

Aki woiye you'll tempt him to want to get in your pants

Aki woiye... can you not see we are protecting you from these animals by subtly putting you down? Making you question your worth?

Aki woiye... you cannot see that he has no will to control himself from pinning you on a wall and assaulting you just because your pants appreciate your curves?

AKI WOIYE!!! The poor man...

Maam- tuck your lips... Thank you :))

I do not see anyone calling out men who have overly tight pants which clearly show prints of everything! Oh, wait! Is it because it's okay for me to see and tolerate a man's crotch?

Awh, my bad! I have been so misinformed for the past twenty-one years of my life!

Away with the argument that men are visual creatures...

It's like saying men get possessed and they have the right to act on their lower instincts so women have to cover up.

Women have to understand, be detached, and numb to violence against them.

Women have to watch themselves...

It's as if men's desires and hormones are the only thing that matters.

I mean, women have desires too... Are we not made of the same nature?!

Whatever possesses you, whatever you struggle with- struggle with it alone.

Unless it's a call for help to better yourself but not hurt other people.

Not to strangle and watch life drain from a woman's face just to dismember her.

Not to pleasure yourself with violence towards a woman because you thought of reenacting your favorite pornography video.

So, to the devil crawling between these streets and whispering sweet nothings to end up killing or sexually assaulting women- your days are numbered.

And to the men who are calling out the problem yet live lives where they view women's beauty as just their body and still hypersexualize their bodies...

You are still sexualizing a woman's body.

Viewing sex as simply a tool for pleasure or a pastime corrupts what sex was made for.

It completely disregards the sanctity of it.

Before you yap and say, 'But sex is just sex and they're just a warm body...'

Think of the effect on your soul and your body.

I believe in soul ties but you do not have to.

I know some may have recognized a certain feeling.

A kind of empty deep hole that you constantly want to fill yet it's insatiable.

You know it's bad for you yet you yearn for more. You know.

As I said, people know EXACTLY what they are doing.

Do better for yourself but who am I to judge?

Before I close this piece, I'd like to quote what a good friend of mine said from a conversation.

The context is about some audiences that encourage sexual activities because they think it's okay.

"People think it's okay and encourage the behavior. Women think it's empowering. The world simply does not care and we keep nailing Jesus over and over."

Yet here people are lashing women who have died from violence against them.

Seeing the log in your brother's eye- I do not think there is a better way of putting it.

I quote once again

"The root problem at the end of the day is what people have been exposed to and how they interpret it.

Mind: Abstracts a warped idea of sex through pornographic material.

Reality: women exist for pleasure and I am free to take it as I wish.

Language: Rape is okay."

This three-step program speaks more than the stockpile of words I have typed previously.

I'm off to pray for humanity to be restored and for my bitter heart to be filled to the brim with grace.

Nothing but cocoa love,

Sam 🌻